Goodbye

I said goodbye to my friend today. "Friend" seems like such an inadequate term for it though. He was, as I have said before, a mentor, but he was also my teacher, spiritual advisor and confidant. I could not have asked for a more sensitive person to see me through some of my toughest moments.

When my mother passed away Dr. Conyers served as a shoulder to cry on and as a neck to hug. His demeanor and confidence, despite his own illness, became the strength in my own resolve. He and my mother were cut of the same stone. Determined and courageous on the outside, yet glistening like a geode on the inside. It was never, "Poor me" or "I just can't." These were two people that never thought of themselves first. Life was lived in service to others.

For example, my mother, after being diagnosed with two separate life-ending diseases spent much of her time as a hospice volunteer. Likewise Chip, while still maintaining his teaching schedule in Waco, would commute to the hospital in Houston and be back the next day for class. Serving and loving others was their m.o. I pray that I can exude that same confidence and selflessness in my own life. Sometimes I confuse my personal sense of purpose with that of the Father's. Brennan Manning writes in his book Ruthless Trust that "even if we accept the fact that we are a word uttered by God, we may not grasp what he is trying to say through us....In patient endurance we wait for God to make clear what he wants to say through us."

Patient endurance. How about asking for that the next time you pray. I know I will.

p.s. In my links I have included Dr. Conyers' homepage. For those of you interested check out the guestbook. You will be touched and inspired at Dr. Conyers' lasting impression on so many of us that knew him.